In this episode, we talk about the not-so-fun reality of being a six percent entrepreneur and how one can work to make their own happy.
This episode is a very special episode because this is the 100th episode. It's technically 101 if you count the trailer but it's the 100th episode and I am super excited about this episode because we are going to go deep into some of the dark parts of being a six entrepreneur, but not too dark. I'll keep it happy for you guys.
Before I get into that I did want to do a couple of shout-outs, so big shout out to Rome or house who wrote me a comment on a few of the episodes and noted that we have some of the same hobbies. Also, a big shout out to Anti lava who wrote me on Instagram and was asking me a little bit more about my perfect average day, and if my thoughts have changed about marriage since then if you're interested in that episode, go check it out. Episode 47. Also a big shout out to Ethan XH. Ethan tells me that he listens to my podcast every single morning on the way to the studio. Ethan is a record producer out in Nashville Tennessee. And fun fact Ethan actually made the sonic ID that you here at the beginning of every single one of my episodes. Very talented guy, Ethan made that. Thank you, Ethan. And then finally also a big shout out to Anne Young Beck who also listens to episodes of the six or entrepreneur in her car. And finally, none of this actually would have been, you know, possible without my partner in crime, Ana, who is my assistant who has been managing this entire podcast publishing for me and has made it really easy, and then she also keeps me motivated and keep me on track to make sure that I get an episode out every single day. So thank you, thank you so much for checking out the podcast and for being a six percenter entrepreneur.
So today's episode, here's what I want to talk about. What I want to talk about is happiness is a choice and when I started realizing this, a few scary things happen because I wasn't really sure how to relate to the world, so to give you a little bit more contacts and let me back up and kind of start from the beginning a little. A six of entrepreneur is a hypomaniac and people that are hypomanic, these are your natural-born entrepreneurs and they call hypomania the natural-born entrepreneur disease. So part of being a natural-born entrepreneur Is having type two bipolar disorder and type two bipolar disorder. A quick review is when you alternate between depression and hypomania. So this podcast is going to kind of shed a little bit of light on some of my depressive episodes.
I think in my past there have definitely been times when I felt like I was not being myself and I wasn't really sure how to pinpoint what I was feeling or express what I was feeling. But what I did know is that the way that I'm relating to the world is not, that is not the way that I would like to relate to the world, and the day that I knew that there was something wrong was when I went to Paris. Okay, so this was when I was still working at ADF trading and it's March and I would take a lot of different learning vacations. So part of the trading job, it's cool because we would have These 10 day long weeks off every two months and I will take that to go travel and I will take these learning vacations.
So before I went to Colombia to go learn how to speak Spanish and then my plan was to go to Paris to go learn how to speak French. So I booked a, it was, I think it was like a two-week trip that I booked, booked a two-week trip and my dog is in the background crying because she wants to go outside. So I'm gonna have to wrap this podcast up really quickly. But on this trip, I booked my Airbnb, I actually bought first-class tickets um and these are like the first-class seats that lie down all the way and you have your own private compartment so you can go to sleep and it was gonna be a baller time.
But on my way to Paris, even though I had these amazing seats, That entire trip was a direct flight. I think it was around 13 hours from Houston to Paris and I was bawling crying my eyes out on the entire flight. I was lucky that I had this partition where no one could see me, but I am damn sure that they heard me and this is like, I was just thinking to myself, I'm about to experience this amazing vacation, I'm about to go to Paris and go learn all these things and do all these things that I love doing. So why am I not happy? By the time I got to Paris it was really gloomy, it rained almost every single day and just being there seeing a lot of young couples walk around and I was you know a little bit older and just by myself, it didn't really feel like the place for me, not only that I was going through a very severe depressive episode, so it just felt like people were able to see that and I felt exposed and it was very uncomfortable.
So I'm supposed to stay in Paris for two weeks. I only make it five days on the fifth day. I was like okay, this is nuts, I have to go home, I cannot be here because I was, I felt like I was losing my mind. It was just so dark, gloomy and it was not a happy place for me. So I bought a ticket um an overnight ticket, I don't know what you call it, the same day ticket the next day ticket. Anyway, uh I bought a ticket like right away just to go back home and I gave up my Airbnb. I just completely left Paris and I went home. Flew back to Houston the very next day after I flew back to Houston, I went and I started making appointments with different therapists and I would, you know, I decided that hey this is something that's outside of my control and I definitely need to go get some professional help for this.
So I booked some time with some therapists and I and the first one that I met, like she was trying to be helpful, but I don't think that we actually vibe, so it wasn't a good vibe. However, we talked and I didn't think it was really helpful. Um, I spent the rest of the vacation time just you know, crying in my apartment until I had to go back to work, and then when I went back to work I met with my manager and I let him know kind of what was going on. It really didn't seem like they cared. So that was that was kind of like the story there.
And then I started interviewing with a few other therapists and psychiatrists and I met a team that was really, really good. They were super expensive, but they were really good. And they changed my life even though I was with them for a very brief period. And the way they changed my life is they made me realize that happiness is a choice. I can choose to be happy. And the way that you make yourself happy, to the way you give yourself to therapy is to change your environment and make your environment that's conducive to happiness.
So a few things that I did to make me happy was the number one thing that I did was I stopped talking to anyone that was toxic in my life. So you were going to have people in your life that love you that care about you. But they don't know how to love and they don't know how to care properly and because they are going through their own struggles, their own suffering, sometimes it's better just to let them go do their own thing and you worry about you and you worry about making yourself happy. So that's one part of it.
The other part which actually didn't sit right with me at the beginning was the realization that my mood and general feeling was the result of chemical reactions in my brain. And I can change these chemical reactions with pharmaceuticals, with drugs. So, I was given a prescription for Fluoxetine, better known as Prozac. And I take around 40 mg of Prozac every single day. And this didn't really sit right with me because I was thinking if I can just put chemicals in my brain and these chemicals all to my mood and my feeling and just like kind of shape the type of person that I am then, who am I really? And I couldn't sit with this. It's actually made me feel very uncomfortable. It made me feel like I had no control over my own life. And then it kind of just hit me and I just let go and instead of deciding that or not deciding, but pondering who am I? I just decided you know what I am going to choose to be happy. And part of this choice to be happy is I will take chemicals and I will take drugs that alter my mood and it's okay.
And ever since I've been okay with that, the way that I look at the world now is I look at the world as the Matrix. I can do whatever I want to do to make me happy. And I think this is where episode 47 comes into play when you're talking about the perfect average day, is this actually outlines how you want to be able to live your life and you can live a ridiculous, crazy life that other people can't even imagine, and this power is actually available to you. The thing is you just have to visualize it and then start working backwards to it.
So for me, I know that my mood and my general feeling, my personality is affected by my environment and the chemicals in my brain or the lack of chemicals in my brain. So now I'm just doing every possible thing for me to be happy and I feel like I'm just living in the Matrix and I'm just running around fucking shit up and doing things that just make me happy. So if you're feeling sad or if you feel depressed, I hope that this will help you realize that you can choose to be happy. And the way you start is just by altering your environment and making it one that's conducive to happiness. Hope that helps. Happy 100th episode! This is Robin Copernicus. Boom. Bam, I'm out.
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